Filthy Millennial lacks commitment.

Hobbies come and go just like my past relationships, one boyfriend introduced me to metal music, couldn't make out the lyrics 95% of the time but I still enjoy the occasional pig squeal bass drop. A different boyfriend introduced me to hiking and video games, clearly we didn't get too far (symbol crash). The last boyfriend...


Oh geez...

What did we even do? I honestly think we just drank...

Ope...


Okay, I remember we watched a lot of movies and we would drink our own bottles of wine. He would drink a bottle of red wine and I would drink a bottle of moscato filled with ice...


Woof.


I'm a lot more classy than I was back then. I prefer a Cabernet Sauvignon now but, I think I'm allergic to wine, so I don't participate that much. I stick with beer and any knowledge about beer sampling or beer facts I have, come from my Dad and the Bell's Brewery twitter page.


Hobbies are difficult for me to commit to, I join in for the initial craze of a hobby and then I ghost said hobby once I get bored.


I’m terrible at deciphering my hobbies from my career, for example; acting, improv and blogging are all hobbies. They're also skills I exercise in my career. It’s hard to seperate work from play because my work is play...


Oh my gawd, am I overthinking hobbies just like I overthink my relationships!?

THERAPIST BRETT WE HAVE A BREAKTHROUGH.


I must sound very boring while on a date because when a guy asks me about my hobbies, it goes something like this...


Date: So, what are you into?


FM: Well......(crickets)......I enjoy beer...(crickets)...exploring new breweries?.....(crickets)....how about you?

(Oh come on, WE’RE BETTER THAN THIS!)


Date: Well I enjoy beer and visiting new breweries too.

(I don't buy it, because you're sitting there with a Budweiser...I'm silently judging you.)

I have recently started up CrossFit, but I also run and I lift a lot of weights.

(shit, I could have said running and dance videos...)


I love to cook.

(Great, I don’t.)


I'm currently, reading "The Hobbit," I'm apart of a book club that really keeps me in check.

(oh gawd the last book I read was in June and it wasn't even a new book)


But the hobby that I'm really into is woodworking, I just finished making a custom dining room table for myself.

(I went on a date with a paramedic once and he too was really into woodworking, he was also a piece of shit. This isn't going to go anywhere.)


FM: Wow, that is quite an impressive list of hobbies you have. I forgot to mention that I enjoy running and I like to read too.


Date: Nice, what are you reading?


FM: I’m revisiting Twilight...


Here is a list of appropriate hobbies that I forgot to mention:


  • So obviously, new beer/exploring new breweries

  • Running

  • Blogging (THAT COUNTS)

  • Vinyl Record collecting

  • Reading

  • Wonder Woman collecting

  • D&D

  • Traveling! The only time I travel though is for work...that still counts, right?


Oh my gawd, I think I just discovered something about myself, I don't have a life outside of my work...

THERAPIST BRETT WE HAVE A BREAKTHROUGH.


I need an actual hobby that doesn't involve drinking new beers, like okay exercising is a hobby, reading is a hobby...I need a "woodworking" type of hobby...


This summer, I revisited my box of old hobbies, a box filled with beads, scrapbooking supplies, knitting needles, a crochet hook and watercolor paint.


Since we had a stay at home order, I was determined to learn how to knit. I video chatted with a friend of mine for a one on one knitting tutorial because she's a pro! I knitted for about 2 weeks...


I picked up the crochet hook and I managed to make one thing...it was supposed to be a scarf but it somehow turned into a pot handle holder...but we all know that it looks like a reusable condom.


The watercolor paints were dry.


Scrapbooking and beading are out of the question because I'm working in a 245 sq. ft. studio apartment that's already packed with stuff, cool stuff. These two hobbies are at least an accumulated 5 year commitment.


When in the market for a new hobby, I check out what my sister is doing. My sister is a crafty DIY gawdess and she freakin' knows it. She knits, she crochets, she scrapbooks, any crafty thing she picks up, she's already a pro.


She's a craftin' hoe and I hate her for it.

(Does this line need to be here? No. But I will call my sister a "craftin' hoe" any chance I get.)


Her main hobby, cross-stitch.


My sister is apart of multiple cross stitching groups on social media, she's apart of a group that is doing "No New Starts 2021." Before the new year, she had to document all of her "WIPS" (works in progress), we took 30 photos...That is 30 patterns...this bitch be stitchin' 30 projects in 2021.


30!


Helping her sort and snap photos was annoying but, I grew intrigued by cross stitching - so many feminist statements and dirty words...


Cross stitching isn't just for old people.

THERAPIST BRETT WE HAVE A BREAKTHROUGH.


But, like any younger sibling who didn't want to show interest in their older sibling's hobby,


I said, "This is dumb."


After we finished documenting patterns, I sat on the foot of her bed, flipping through her pile of pattern books and before I could stop myself, I said out loud,

"I wish I could have a cool hobby like cross-stitching."


You'd think my sister had IBS with how quickly she got out of her bed.


Immediately, she started going through her cross stitch cabinet that is not only filled with everything she needs for her own projects but, then some. She began to create a "cross stitching kit" for me.


What have I done.


She sent me home with a snowflake pattern, red floss, green fabric and an embroidery hoop frame..


It took me a couple of months or so to finish the pattern but, I did it.



My sister frequently emails me now about sales from specific cross stitch designers or if there are any "Stitch Along" projects that I might be interested in...


"Stitch Alongs" are for one pattern that is broken up into sections. Then, every week or couple of weeks a new section of the pattern is released. It's a big deal in the cross stitch community, there are social media groups, zoom calls, emails...everything.


I am currently participating in one and we zoom on Friday's...



























I'm already behind.





















But, I swear, I'm going to commit so hard! I've bitten off more than I can chew and I've spent too much money already!




This weekend, my sister is coming to visit me and our weekend will be as follows, stitch, bitch and make charcuterie boards.


You could turn that into a cross stitch design.

Shit.


Now that I've found a hobby that has no association with my career whatsoever (I'm still hesitant but I'm hopeful), maybe this is a sign for the future of my marital status.


I just have to remember that this counts as a freakin' hobby along with all of the other hobbies that don't involve drinking.


Happy stitching everyone!







*Last week, I panic purchased another 6 pack of Hopslam*